When we struggle with the way we feel about ourselves, we feel trapped. Playing the role of the “victim” is something that is done subconsciously because we tend to get used to our routine of focusing on the things we don’t have in our lives. When you continue to beat yourself down for the things you don’t have you begin to lose appreciation for what you see in the mirror; you. You begin to think ” how could anyone love someone like me?” Well to be honest, you won’t ever accept anyone loving you until you learn to love you.
Self-love is a term that most people have a common understanding of but find some sort of reason to feel jaded about it. The idea is that some level of social status or physical appearance is the only way you can feel good about yourself. Well I’m here to squash that idea simply because there is no better feeling that loving what you see in the mirror and once that can happen, you’ll begin to attract more love into your life than you could have ever imagined.
I want you to take a moment right now, wherever it may be that you are reading this, or because this exercise is super helpful, I want you to think for a moment about 10 things you love. It can be anything in this world that you truly love and feel passionate about. Call it a Gratitude list if you will, but spend a little time really thinking about 10 things you LOVE. Take one last look at this list and set it aside. I’ll touch back to that later on so be sure to keep reading!
Let’s jump back into this idea of “self-love” so I can clear up any uncertain beliefs or definitions you may have on the topic. Self-love by all other definitions means regard for ones own well-being and happiness. So, this is being concerned for and making decisions for the sake of yourself and your happiness. Happiness is simply created from within so until you find love in yourself, you won't find love anywhere on the outside. Unfortunately this term has transitioned into something relying on external factors or maintaining a certain physical appearance to make it okay to love ourselves or feel happy. But this type of love or happiness is more than likely temporary and we cycle back to that feeling of low self-worth and lack of appreciation for ourselves.
The actual truth around self-love is that no physical feature or status in the world makes you less likely to be loved or have the ability to love yourself. It takes a level of commitment to yourself to wake up daily and feel truly grateful for what you are and what you have. And the constant nit-picking or analyzing of yourself is the way to carry a negative view of yourself keeping you from seeing the good. Starting the day off with positive words, feelings and thoughts about YOU is where happiness will begin and manifest into your life.
You may be asking right now, how does this translate into your own life or maybe why I had you write out that list before. This is where I share the purpose of that list. Take a look at it. How many items were material goods in your life? How many were physical feature based? And where on the list did you put YOU? My guess is probably no where. This is the moment I want you to look into a mirror or reflection of some sort say say out loud (unless you’re in public you can whisper) “I am beautiful, worthy, and loved. I love me!”
Integrate that phrase into your morning routine and I am sure that the way you feel and see yourself will begin to shift. Nothing is more rewarding and powerful than self-love and once you begin to invest into the happiness of you, you will create a life you are proud of.